He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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