I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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