its not stalking. its research.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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