that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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