you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
