No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
