dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
