Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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