You smell like a Billy Joel song
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
