The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
