That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
i black out too much to be "responsible"
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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