he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
