in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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