I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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