Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
