I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
