I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
