Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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