i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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