I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Two words: nipple clamps
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