Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
