ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
