Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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