you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
