I feel like abortions should bother me more
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
