i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Randomize
