In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Randomize
