i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
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