i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
All I want is dick and wine.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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