are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
