Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
