Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
