brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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