I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
you didnt know i had herpes?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
