so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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