Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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