So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
