Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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