yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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