True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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