Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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