What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
