you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
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