Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
