When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
