I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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