If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
