I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
