We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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