he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
